Tuesday, January 03, 2012

the natives

an all natural, sleek look.
shimmy and shined thoroughly.
no loose ends.
all tied together.
all tied up.
until
the sun
becomes an ember
sinking into
the sea...

grimm

Monday, January 02, 2012

making it to the clearing

happy new year. right? that's the gig. i've found reason to believe, vision, clarity, and spark. to drive without the crash. how anything happens seems like such a simple thing; just make a plan for yourself.

my plans will be quiet and private. blogger's irony. but, i will put forth my cyber foot and analog heart. i had a most frightening dream last night and my immediate reflection led me to these conclusions:

1. i am out of control
2. there are no reasons why i shouldn't be in control
3. even if i can't control my immediate situation, i should take deep breaths and try again.

what great dream did i have?

it was not my dead mother coming to give me advice in some sage like yoda moment... no... infrequently i will meet her again in my dreams, but it is never in a space where i exclaim, "MOM! I miss you; I love you!" Those episodes are almost always second hand or incidental where she talks to me just as she did when she was alive. i don't know why that is, but i suppose that's the deal, right?

the dream was the out of control classroom dream... for years i had the same basic dream the day before school starts... the class is out of control, kids talking... not sitting in their assigned seats... and me raising my voice, raising my voice, to the point of screaming. then, i will ask one student, "Why won't they listen to me?" the student replies, "Because you're you."

Ugh.

the dream last night though... the same premise but slightly different. every hooligan i've taught seemed to be there. i wasn't afraid; i knew the job ahead of me; i knew the job would require great energy; i knew it would take focus; i understood the demands of my time.

so here i am.

how consistent can i be? i can tell you this much, i started with the damn blog i've been ignoring.

grimm